圖書標籤: 心理 心理學 個人成長 性格 美國 英語 英文原版 至少不似想您般奧妙
发表于2025-01-02
Quiet pdf epub mobi txt 電子書 下載 2025
At least one-third of the people we know are introverts. They are the ones who prefer listening to speaking, reading to partying; who innovate and create but dislike self-promotion; who favor working on their own over brainstorming in teams. Although they are often labeled "quiet," it is to introverts that we owe many of the great contributions to society--from van Gogh’s sunflowers to the invention of the personal computer.
Passionately argued, impressively researched, and filled with indelible stories of real people, Quiet shows how dramatically we undervalue introverts, and how much we lose in doing so. Taking the reader on a journey from Dale Carnegie’s birthplace to Harvard Business School, from a Tony Robbins seminar to an evangelical megachurch, Susan Cain charts the rise of the Extrovert Ideal in the twentieth century and explores its far-reaching effects. She talks to Asian-American students who feel alienated from the brash, backslapping atmosphere of American schools. She questions the dominant values of American business culture, where forced collaboration can stand in the way of innovation, and where the leadership potential of introverts is often overlooked. And she draws on cutting-edge research in psychology and neuroscience to reveal the surprising differences between extroverts and introverts.
Perhaps most inspiring, she introduces us to successful introverts--from a witty, high-octane public speaker who recharges in solitude after his talks, to a record-breaking salesman who quietly taps into the power of questions. Finally, she offers invaluable advice on everything from how to better negotiate differences in introvert-extrovert relationships to how to empower an introverted child to when it makes sense to be a "pretend extrovert."
This extraordinary book has the power to permanently change how we see introverts and, equally important, how introverts see themselves.
Q: Why did you write the book?
A: For the same reason that Betty Friedan published The Feminine Mystique in 1963. Introverts are to extroverts what women were to men at that time--second-class citizens with gigantic amounts of untapped talent. Our schools, workplaces, and religious institutions are designed for extroverts, and many introverts believe that there is something wrong with them and that they should try to “pass” as extroverts. The bias against introversion leads to a colossal waste of talent, energy, and, ultimately, happiness.
Q: What personal significance does the subject have for you?
A: When I was in my twenties, I started practicing corporate law on Wall Street. At first I thought I was taking on an enormous challenge, because in my mind, the successful lawyer was comfortable in the spotlight, whereas I was introverted and occasionally shy. But I soon realized that my nature had a lot of advantages: I was good at building loyal alliances, one-on-one, behind the scenes; I could close my door, concentrate, and get the work done well; and like many introverts, I tended to ask a lot of questions and listen intently to the answers, which is an invaluable tool in negotiation. I started to realize that there’s a lot more going on here than the cultural stereotype of the introvert-as-unfortunate would have you believe. I had to know more, so I spent the past five years researching the powers of introversion.
Q: Was there ever a time when American society valued introverts more highly?
A: In the nation’s earlier years it was easier for introverts to earn respect. America once embodied what the cultural historian Warren Susman called a “Culture of Character,” which valued inner strength, integrity, and the good deeds you performed when no one was looking. You could cut an impressive figure by being quiet, reserved, and dignified. Abraham Lincoln was revered as a man who did not “offend by superiority,” as Emerson put it.
Q: You discuss how we can better embrace introverts in the workplace. Can you explain?
A: Introverts thrive in environments that are not overstimulating—surroundings in which they can think (deeply) before they speak. This has many implications. Here are two to consider: (1) Introverts perform best in quiet, private workspaces—but unfortunately we’re trending in precisely the opposite direction, toward open-plan offices. (2) If you want to get the best of all your employees’ brains, don’t simply throw them into a meeting and assume you’re hearing everyone’s ideas. You’re not; you’re hearing from the most vocally assertive people. Ask people to put their ideas in writing before the meeting, and make sure you give everyone time to speak.
Q: Quiet offers some terrific insights for the parents of introverted children. What environment do introverted kids need in order to thrive, whether it’s at home or at school?
A: The best thing parents and teachers can do for introverted kids is to treasure them for who they are, and encourage their passions. This means: (1) Giving them the space they need. If they need to recharge alone in their room after school instead of plunging into extracurricular activities, that’s okay. (2) Letting them master new skills at their own pace. If they’re not learning to swim in group settings, for example, teach them privately. (3) Not calling them “shy”--they’ll believe the label and experience their nervousness as a fixed trait rather than an emotion they can learn to control.
Q: What are the advantages to being an introvert?
A: There are too many to list in this short space, but here are two seemingly contradictory qualities that benefit introverts: introverts like to be alone--and introverts enjoy being cooperative. Studies suggest that many of the most creative people are introverts, and this is partly because of their capacity for quiet. Introverts are careful, reflective thinkers who can tolerate the solitude that idea-generation requires. On the other hand, implementing good ideas requires cooperation, and introverts are more likely to prefer cooperative environments, while extroverts favor competitive ones.
珊·凱恩,畢業於普林斯頓大學和哈佛法學院。曾經是華爾街律師,現從事談判、溝通技巧教育。她在內嚮、羞怯等主題上的文章經常發錶於《紐約時報》和《今日心理學在綫》。
譯者簡介:
高潔,生於山東,於香港城市大學獲得傳播與新媒體碩士;翻譯愛好者,公關業中人。
三星半,友好對待安靜的內嚮型,關鍵是要有愛。
評分這世界真的都對外嚮的人看起。內嚮的人往往都被忽略。可是更善於觀察的他們,真的會發錶一擊斃命的言論/想法。
評分我是一個外嚮的人,自然對內嚮的人不感冒,更加不感冒這種為內嚮“正名”的書,我覺得這樣的書,就是內嚮的人不自信的錶現,你管我內嚮外嚮,我管你怎麼說我,怎麼看我,我就做我自己。可惜,內嚮的人就是這麼在乎彆人的感受。
評分我是一個外嚮的人,自然對內嚮的人不感冒,更加不感冒這種為內嚮“正名”的書,我覺得這樣的書,就是內嚮的人不自信的錶現,你管我內嚮外嚮,我管你怎麼說我,怎麼看我,我就做我自己。可惜,內嚮的人就是這麼在乎彆人的感受。
評分A lot of good ideas on what makes up a personality, and how it can change from one situation to another
这本书有多少科学性呢? 就是将自己的经历分享出来,然后总结。果然积极心理学就如传闻般那么坑爹。 知识点密度说实话低得可怜,像喝白开水一样。 而内向有优势,稍微用脑子就可以想得出来。 只能说,这本书除了给那些精神低落的人稍稍提神,没什么作用。
評分1、给内向者的建议:在周末的时候尽量保持自己安静的本性,在工作日里努力“走出自己的世界,流露出混合的性格,跟你的团队和同事联系,调动起你可以控制的一切能量”。(而如果你是个外向的人,你应该让你的周末回归本我变得疯狂起来,上课的时候专注于学业。) 2、你在某些领...
評分如作者所言,美国社会中,内向者约占1/3-1/2的比例。考虑到美国是一个移民社会,移民崇尚冒险,而冒险/谨慎与外向/内向有正相关性。那么在非移民社会,内向者的比例应该会更高才对。 以中国而论,数千年结构稳定的农耕社会显然不需要那么多的外向者,安分守己的内向者才是这个...
評分这本书让我改变了很多对自己对他人的了解观念。更加客观的描述内向者和外向者的性格区别,只是里面举得例子,对于成长在中国的好多内向孩子,不太符合。美国的家庭教育大部分尊重孩子的想法,而在中国,内向的孩子则是伴随着更加彻底绝望的否定中成长的,他们需要破除童年阴影...
評分很难相信这是某年度的最佳非虚构书。读这本书时从头到尾只感觉内向的自己被理解,并且很高兴有人为内向者写一本书,但令人失望的是并没有读到新知识。99%的篇幅描写内向人群的特征、心理、出发点、以及实验证明他们如何不比别人差,社会应该如何避免“偏向”外向者。如果你已经...
Quiet pdf epub mobi txt 電子書 下載 2025