The first book specifically for daughters suffering from the emotional abuse of selfish, self-involved mothers, Will I Ever Be Good Enough? provides the expert assistance you need in order to overcome this debilitating history and reclaim your life for yourself. Drawing on over two decades of experience as a therapist specializing in women's psychology and health, psychotherapist Dr. Karyl McBride helpsyou recognize the widespread effects of this maternal emotional abuse and guides you as you create an individualized program for self-protection, resolution, and complete recovery. An estimated 1.5 million American women have narcissistic personality disorder, which makes them so insecure and overbearing, insensitive and domineering that they can psychologically damage their daughters for life. Daughters of narcissistic mothers learn that maternal love is not unconditional, and that it is given only when they behave in accordance with their mothers' often unreasonable expectations and whims. As adults, these daughters consequently have difficulty overcoming their insecurities and feelings of inadequacy, disappointment, sadness, and emotional emptiness. They may also have a terrible fear of abandonment that leads them to form unhealthy love relationships, as well as a tendency to perfectionism and unrelenting self-criticism, or to self-sabotage and frustration. Herself the recovering daughter of a narcissistic mother, Dr. McBride includes her personal struggle, which adds a profound level of authority to her work, along with the perspectives of the hundreds of suffering daughters she's interviewed over the years. Their stories of how maternal abuse has manifested in their lives -- as well as how they have successfully overcome its effects -- show you that you're not alone and that you can take back your life and have the control you want. Dr. McBride's step-by-step program will enable you to: (1) Recognize your own experience with maternal narcissism and its effects on all aspects of your life
(2) Discover how you have internalized verbal and nonverbal messages from your mother and how these have translated into a strong desire to overachieve or a tendency to self-sabotage
(3) Construct a step-by-step program to reclaim your life and enhance your sense of self, a process that includes creating a psychological separation from your mother and breaking the legacy of abuse. You will also learn how not to repeat your mother's mistakes with your own daughter. Warm and sympathetic, filled with the examples of women who have established healthy boundaries with their hurtful mothers, Will I Ever Be Good Enough? encourages and inspires you as it aids your recovery.
作者卡瑞尔·麦克布莱德,美国注册婚姻和家庭治疗学家,已有28年的心理咨询实践经验,是治疗家庭问题方面的专家。近十几年里,麦克布莱德博士主要从事有关自恋家长对孩子影响的研究,已经成功解决了许多此类案例。麦克布莱德博士还在创伤、性虐待、家庭暴力、离婚、重组家庭、婚姻和家庭治疗方面拥有广泛经验,她专长EMDR创伤治疗、以及涉及焦虑、忧郁和人生转折的个体适应治疗。
译者于玲娜,浙江大学心理学硕士,主攻心理语言学,业余爱好文学、哲学和艺术。曾用笔名“罗豫”在《南方都市报》、《广州日报》、《新京报》等媒体上发表书评十余万字。
她又来了,用她最熟练的粗暴语言,讽刺挖苦埋怨。可能这样才能保证她内心世界的和平。但以前的我不行,会受她影响,长时间回想我是不是这样做不对,我是不是真的很差劲,我是不是不配得到爱。 终于,在我们分开的时间大于原生捆绑时间后,在我终于经营好自己的家庭后,在我为我...
评分俗话说“清官难断家务事”,家庭内部的是非对错,往往很难用公共空间中的伦理道德标准来判断。吴飞在关于中国农村自杀现象的书《浮生取义——对华北某县自杀现象的文化解读》中,就把很多自杀案例解读为对家庭内部“不公”的极端反应。家庭问题想必普遍存在在各种文化中,在...
评分这本书很早就看过一遍了,但它于我,是常读常新。每次对母亲的感情有所困惑,我都会拿出来再读一遍。也许我就是喜欢这个书名,母爱的羁绊,这书名看得人很痛快,让被神话了的母爱去一边吧,让什么仁慈伟大去一边儿吧,世上的感情,爱到极致一定有恨。 面对妈妈我有太多的奇葩...
评分 评分写得不错。虽然我也没有看完。
评分作者核心关注点是女儿该如何认识并应对自恋型人格母亲对其带来的长期创伤。女儿认为自己不够好、不值得被爱,很多时候都是由于母亲将女儿视作自己的延续而非独立的个体引发的。认识并接受母亲也犯错,容许自己毫无保留地悲伤,重塑自己的“内在母亲”形象,把自己当成一个小女孩来去宠爱,都是在恢复进程中特别重要的。
评分看的第一本关于母女关系的书 每天感受着肚子里宝宝 第一次学习parenting 作者根据自己多年临床经验描述了一段完整的therapy过程 惊讶于narcissistic mother对于孩子造成的阴影 最喜欢最后一章对于parenting的总结 比如教会孩子authenticity/accountability/empathy等等
评分在康复和母亲的关系时,了解心理过程并且允许发生,对于疏通情绪和精神的生长很重要。成为独立的人❤️
评分有关女儿的心态(比如为什么总觉得自己不够好)这部分以及觉察并体验自己的「感受」为什么很重要,作者要是能说得再详细一些就好了。承认对方此刻很生气能平息对方的愤怒。哀悼(grieve/grief)五步骤:denial => anger => bargaining => depression => acceptance.
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