STOP. You should not have touched this book with your bare hands. NO, don’t put it down. It’s too late. They’re watching you. My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you’ll read on these pages, about the sauce , about Korrok , about the invasion, and the future. But it’s too late. You touched the book. You’re in the game. You’re under the eye . The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why? You just have to trust me. The important thing is this: The drug is called Soy Sauce and it gives users a window into another dimension. John and I never had the chance to say no. You still do. Unfortunately for us, if you make the right choice, we’ll have a much harder time explaining how to fight off the otherworldly invasion currently threatening to enslave humanity . I’m sorry to have involved you in this, I really am. But as you read about these terrible events and the very dark epoch the world is about to enter as a result, it is crucial you keep one thing in mind: None of this is was my fault.

作者簡介

王大衛（David Wong）

是傑森．帕金（Jason Pargin）的筆名。帕金是線上搞笑作家，搞笑雜誌《國家諷刺雜誌》的撰稿人，以及Cracked.com網站的主編。更多消息請上 www.johndiesattheend.com。

譯者簡介

蘇雅薇

台灣大學外文系畢業，現為師範大學翻譯所碩士生。喜歡為了休閒而閱讀，為了翻譯而閱讀。譯有《綠能經濟真相和你以為的不一樣》（合譯）、《懂這些中學知識你就非常吸引人》、《你回來的時候》等書。