INTRODUCTION<br >Necessity， as well as instinct， sends the ladies pell-<br >mell to the altar; it is only the secondary things，<br >social pressure or conscience， that send the men.<br > --Emily Hahn， 1956<br >The fact that men marry in precisely the same numbers as<br >women do conceals， a basic inequality of motivation: namely，<br >that in the sort of marriage we have rather suddenly come to<br >see as "traditional，" women need men much more than men<br >need women. When I was growing up in the fifties， everyone<br >acknowledged the "battle of the sexes" in which women "held<br >out" for as long as possible， until， by dint of persuasion， sexual<br >frustration or sudden pregnancy， they "landed a man." From<br >their side of the battle lines， men viewed the proceedings with<br >a certain sarcastic detachment. For example， a 1958 article in<br >Esquire described courtship with humorous references to the<br >military theories of Field Marshal Rommel and offered the<br >following account of a typical girl s attempt to win an "MRS"<br >degree:<br >College is four years， okay? . . . A freshman dates every-<br >body. She doesn t care. A sophomore dates in flurries.<br > . . Now a junior is looking for real love. She ll go out<br >three times with a boy who is a Possible who is possible.<br >She may worry:there aren t enough Possibles in her immediate circle of<br >friends. So she gets interested in extra-curricular activities，<br ><br >