About this book
“Will all the adulterers in the room please stand up?” So begins Laura Kipnis’s profoundly provocative and waggish inquiry into our never-ending quest for lasting love, and its attendant issues of fidelity and betrayal. In the tradition of social critiques such as Christopher Lasch’s The Culture of Narcissism, Against Love keenly examines the meaning and cultural significance of adultery, arguing that perhaps the question concerns not only the private dilemma of whether or not to be faithful, but also the purpose of this much vaunted fidelity.
With a novelist’s eye for detail, psychological acuity, and linguistic panache, Kipnis at once humorously and seriously explores the rules and rituals of modern coupledom and domesticity (from the establishment of curfews and whereabouts to actual searches and seizures), even as she deftly analyzes the larger power structures that they serve. She wonders: Might adulterers be regarded not only as sexual renegades but as unwitting social theorists posing essential political questions about the social contract itself? What is the trade-off between personal gratification and the renunciations society demands of us? And is “working at your relationship” just another way of propping up the work ethicæas if we weren’t all overworked enough as it is? If adultery is ultimately a referendum on the sustainability of monogamy, how credible is the basic premise of modern coupledom: that desire for your one and only love can and will persist through a lifetime of togetherness (despite so much evidence to the contrary)?
Against Love offers no easy answers. Rather it intends to engage you in a commonsensical and brave examination of the plight of the modern personality, caught between the vicissitudes of desire and the decrees of social conformity.
Praise
“Laura Kipnis’s witty and cunning treatise against modern love is as trenchant and unexpected, as jubilantly incendiary a work of social criticism as I’ve read in years. It is an explosive pleasure.”
--Edward Hirsch
“Against Love is a wonderfully provocative book, daring and incisive, written with verve and no small amount of humor. It raises a thousand questions most of us lack the courage to ask, about domestic life and even the meaning of the human enterprise, while remaining at every instant a delight to read.”
--Scott Turow
“Deeply subversive, tough-minded, clear-thinking, provocative and shrewd, Against Love has the nerve to wonder out loud if marriage has evolved into an instrument of social control. Yet what’s so winning about Kipnis’s manifesto is its high-spirited lack of cynicism; she is not so much against love as for honesty.”
--James Atlas
Author Biography
Laura Kipnis is a professor of media studies at Northwestern University. She has received fellowships and grants from the Guggenheim Foundation, the Rockefeller Foundation, and the National Endowment for the Arts. She has published numerous essays and articles on sexual politics and contemporary culture both here and abroad.
我對這本書的文學成就持非常高的評價,尤其是它在語言上的創造力。作者似乎對傳統的錶達方式感到厭倦,他創造瞭一套屬於這本書內部的詞匯係統和隱喻庫。很多描述情感狀態的詞語,乍一看非常陌生,但讀完上下文後,你會驚嘆於其貼切和新穎。這種語言上的冒險精神,使得閱讀過程充滿瞭發現的樂趣。它挑戰瞭我們對日常語言的依賴,強迫我們用全新的方式去命名那些我們從未敢於正視的內心感受。書中關於“渴望”與“滿足”之間永恒鴻溝的論述,尤其讓我印象深刻,它不是簡單地說“得不到的纔是最好的”,而是深入探討瞭“得到”本身如何成為一種新的“失去”。這本書的篇幅不算短,但由於其文字密度極高,每一頁都蘊含著豐富的信息量,讓人不得不放慢速度,細細咀嚼。它是一本需要被珍藏起來,時不時拿齣來重讀的文本,每一次重讀都會帶來新的感悟,因為它深植於人性的核心睏境之中。
评分說實話,這本書的文風非常“冷峻”,毫不煽情。我期待能讀到一些關於浪漫邂逅或者心靈相通的描繪,但這本書完全沒有滿足我這些“俗氣”的期待。它采取瞭一種近乎人類學田野調查的客觀視角,去觀察和記錄人類在追求連接過程中那些徒勞的掙紮。作者的語言精準到令人發指,每一個動詞、每一個形容詞似乎都經過瞭韆錘百煉,服務於錶達那種冰冷的存在主義睏境。我特彆喜歡它對“距離感”的處理,它探討瞭如何在兩個渴望獨立自我的個體之間維持一個微妙的、不被吞噬的物理和心理空間。這種處理方式,比起那些把“愛”描繪成無所不能的萬靈藥的作品,顯得真實和有力得多。雖然閱讀過程中不時感到一種疏離感,但正是這種疏離感,讓讀者能夠跳脫齣來,以一個旁觀者的角度去審視自身的情感模式。這本書更像是一麵鏡子,映照齣我們努力想隱藏的、關於孤獨的真相。
评分這本書的哲學思辨性實在太強瞭,簡直可以拿來做大學研討會的教材瞭。我注意到作者在探討一係列關於“束縛”與“自由”的悖論時,引用瞭大量晦澀難懂的文本和曆史典故,這使得閱讀過程更像是一場智力上的攀登。它不是那種迎閤大眾口味的暢銷小說,它要求讀者具備一定的知識儲備和耐心去跟隨作者構建的復雜邏輯鏈條。對我個人而言,最大的震撼在於作者如何將個體意誌的抗爭與社會建構的規範進行對比。那些關於“奉獻”、“承諾”的傳統觀念,在作者的筆下,被一層層剝開,露齣瞭其背後冰冷的社會控製邏輯。我必須承認,有些段落我需要反復閱讀三四遍纔能真正理解其深層含義,但這絕對是值得的。因為它打開瞭我看待世界的新視角,讓我開始質疑那些被我們視為“天經地義”的情感準則。這本書的結構非常嚴謹,每一個論點都環環相扣,形成瞭一個滴水不漏的思想迷宮。讀完後,我感覺自己的思維模式被徹底重塑瞭,迫切地想要和同樣讀過這本書的人進行一場深入的辯論。
评分這本書的敘事視角和時間綫處理簡直是一場高難度的實驗。它不是一個綫性的故事,更像是一幅由無數碎片、迴憶的閃迴和假設性的未來場景拼貼而成的馬賽剋。如果你期待一個清晰的主人公和明確的劇情走嚮,你可能會在頭幾章感到迷失和挫敗。但一旦你適應瞭這種非綫性的敘事節奏,你會發現作者的意圖——他想錶達的不是一個單一的情感體驗,而是一種彌漫在現代生活中的、破碎的、多維度的關係狀態。書中那些跳躍的場景,有時候是某人對另一人說的一句話的無限放大,有時候則是對一個動作的哲學剖析。這種結構本身就在模仿我們大腦處理復雜人際關係時的那種跳躍和矛盾。它迫使你的大腦高速運轉,去填補那些留白的綫索,去構建屬於你自己的情感地圖。這本書的閱讀體驗是高度個體化的,你從中學到的東西,很大程度上取決於你內心世界的迴響。
评分天呐,我最近讀完瞭一本讓人心頭一震的書,簡直不敢相信自己的眼睛。這本書的敘事風格極其獨特,它不是那種按部就班地鋪陳情節,而是像一個老朋友拉著你,在你耳邊低語著那些關於人性和情感的隱秘角落。作者的文字像一把鋒利的手術刀,毫不留情地剖開瞭我們習以為常的那些“愛”的假象。我尤其喜歡它對“親密關係”這一概念的解構,它沒有給齣任何明確的答案或救贖,隻是冷靜地展示瞭那些我們試圖用“愛”來粉飾太平的脆弱和不堪。讀到一半的時候,我甚至有點喘不過氣來,感覺自己被剝光瞭所有僞裝,赤裸裸地站在作者的審視之下。這本書的節奏感把握得極好,時而如暴風驟雨般激烈,時而又陷入一種令人窒息的沉寂,這種張弛有度讓讀者完全沉浸其中,無法自拔。它不是一本能讓你讀完後感到輕鬆愉快的書,但它絕對是一次值得的、深刻的、甚至可以說是痛苦的自我審視之旅。我嚮所有對現代情感關係感到睏惑的朋友推薦它,它會逼著你重新思考,你究竟在追逐什麼,又在逃避什麼。
评分deconstruction of modern conception of love and individuality. 做學術,不就是為瞭終有一日可以寫一本這樣的書嗎. (一個想到的是有一天午飯跟social policy的大傢聊到底sex是不是應該變成社會福利
评分deconstruction of modern conception of love and individuality. 做學術,不就是為瞭終有一日可以寫一本這樣的書嗎. (一個想到的是有一天午飯跟social policy的大傢聊到底sex是不是應該變成社會福利
评分deconstruction of modern conception of love and individuality. 做學術,不就是為瞭終有一日可以寫一本這樣的書嗎. (一個想到的是有一天午飯跟social policy的大傢聊到底sex是不是應該變成社會福利
评分deconstruction of modern conception of love and individuality. 做學術,不就是為瞭終有一日可以寫一本這樣的書嗎. (一個想到的是有一天午飯跟social policy的大傢聊到底sex是不是應該變成社會福利
评分deconstruction of modern conception of love and individuality. 做學術,不就是為瞭終有一日可以寫一本這樣的書嗎. (一個想到的是有一天午飯跟social policy的大傢聊到底sex是不是應該變成社會福利
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